Wednesday, March 23, 2016

2016 Asia Mega Trip – Welcome To The Pooh Lee Shah Long March and Public Transit Tour Of China

Greetings long nosed one (evidently Chinese slang for Westerners is people with long noses). Other touring companies take you around in herded masses to see all the same old sites and places and direct you to the same old shopping places that want to separate you from your money. But only here at Pooh Lee Shah Travel we get you the real taste of China with our China Public Transportation and Mao’s Long March Replica Tour. (Ha, ha, ha…no it is not a real replica of the Long March and we guarantee that more than the 10% that survived the original Long March will make it back to your hotel.)

In our tour you will:

  • Find out how ‘real’ Chinese discount airlines run with their wonderful partially operational websites, fictional call centers, Taoist/Zen mystery luggage rules, and quaint travel delay communication mysteries.
  • Learn the ins and outs of hailing down taxis in multiple cities
  • Master the Metro systems of many cities. Learn to read system maps, station layouts, and figure out how to purchase tickets. Learn how to get out of Metro stations (not easy if you’ve lost the card you used to get in). Master the subtle arts of walking over people who refuse to queue properly or try to cut in front of you as the mass pushes up the escalator.
  • Buying Railroad tickets will no longer be a mystery to you after you go through five separate lines to finally get to the one that sells to foreigners.
  • In addition experience one of China’s seminal revolutionary experiences. We intersperse our public transportation experiences with incredibly long, painful walks between a couple of attractions with minimal food, water or rest…This is the REAL revolutionary China!


Gloria said...

Mike did not adequately explain the "queuing" methods used in China. The escalators are the same size as the US - 200-300 people try to get into the device at one time. There is much use of elbows and blocking forms. I have been forcibly elbowed away out of the mass of humanity trying to get on the escalator. The only way to handle it is to push back as hard as you are pushed, otherwise you will never make it on the escalator/train/metro/bus. And it is expected! My observations of the old men in Malta squeezing there way through the crowd to the front of the line has come in very helpful.

Renee Michelle Goertzen said...

Wow. That sounds exhausting.

Well, I guess you go to new countries for new experiences, right? They don't promise that they'll all be good ones...

alexis said...

thank you for adding that mom, lol. I had forgotten!