Working Through It

My older brother and I arrived in Connecticut Sunday late and drove to the hospital where Dad was still in the emergency room. We were there until around midnight when they (the hospital doctors) decided that he had enough going on combined with his weakness to admit him to the hospital. We drove to Dad's house and collapsed.

Next morning was the usual frustration in the hospital as we waited around until some sort of focus could develop on what tests to run toward the end of potentially finding out what. By the afternoon however, a series of tests were scheduled and run. The only negative to these was that my Father was totally beat up and worn out by them all so he looked and felt terrible.

Tuesday was better and worse. Better in that without anymore testing procedures Dad was resting and looking better, but worse in that the doctors were honing in on a diagnosis and unfortunately it was lung cancer. We went through discussions as to whether it made sense to have another procedure that would allow a biopsy. Dad was very firm that if it was cancer he was going to do no chemo or radiation put just wanted to go out as peacefully and painlessly as possible, meaning going into a hospice program. But we thought without the biopsy data that hospice would not be prescribed.

On Wednesday, we found that the doctors felt they had enough information to put him in hospice without the harsh biopsy procedure. That led to a frantic search on the part of my brother and I to research his options - going into a nursing home or having 24/7 care in home. It was really clear the later was going to give him a better quality of end of life. Through Wed and today more running around to get all the pieces together that will allow for this to happen - various MD sigh offs, contracting with this agency for home health care and that agency for hospice services, starting a claim against his long-term care insurance. And there were financial things to do in terms of getting powers of attorney so my brothers and I can act on his behalf.

Everything is supposed to be in order for him to leave the hospital and come home tomorrow. But from my own experience, I know that isn't going to go smoothly - it never does.