D-Day Plus 2 – Wife and Many Others are a Nefarious Group

Well it turned out to be a walking tour of Chinatown ending at a restaurant for lunch. The tour was very interesting, a lot of fun, though with the temperature in the upper forties and lower fifties it got cold. We rendezvoused with the tour guide at a hotel. We also rendezvoused with A and S, parent and stepparent respectively of John the Armenian, our stepson #1. Of course I walked right by them without even noticing them before I finally realized they were there – another of Wife’s surprises.

Once we got done with the tour and lunch (reasonable Cantonese fare but nothing worthy of a write up in and of itself), we went back to the Fairmont where we had left our luggage. Wife is upset because we are running an hour or more late so we’re hoofing it up Nob Hill big time. We get there and she asks me if I mind driving in the city. “No”. “Good we’re renting a car”.
There’s a Hertz kiosk in the Fairmont. Wife has made a reservation. I casually mention I’m Hertz Gold. Girl in kiosk says, “too bad you weren’t on the reservation or I could have gotten you a better car.” She plugs my name into the computer and says, “Oh, you’re a five star!” I didn’t even know that. Then Wife, seeing an opportunity brings out the big gun, “and this is his 60th birthday trip.” Agent - “let me see what I can do.” So we end up with this really fabulous Cadillac STS for the price of Toyota Camry.

Wife says we’re going to do a quick walk in the Muir Woods Redwood Forest to work up to the next eating event. It’s 45 minutes from San Francisco. We get there at 3:30 and hike around for an hour. I always love the Redwood forest. Where to now?

Wife says were driving north. We get on the 101 and it’s 4:30. That means rush hour or not fun driving. Wife says we’re going 48.7 miles (Mapquest) and I say “isn’t that around Santa Rosa where we just were?” No comment.

We go through Santa Rosa and head off the 101 going west. I’m thinking, “this is weird, I know the tastes of the people who were suppose to join us who unfortunately had to cancel out and there is nothing like that that I know of in this region,”

Now we’re heading into the dark, dark, dark countryside. Wife has these directions. We’re suppose to be somewhere by 6:30 but I don’t know where. Evidently it is a house of some kind but we cannot find the road. Stop at a small store. They’ve never heard of the street. I am trying very, very hard to stay calm as we wander around in the dark.

Finally, Wife fishes out different instructions and after two passes we come to this intersection where we think it might be but can’t really figure it out. Then another car comes right next to us and stops. They roll down the window and I do likewise. “Do you know where Corso Road is?” the driver asks. “No, we’re trying to find it too.” Then one of the people in the back of the car says “Doesn’t someone have a birthday?” I take a closer look in the car and sloooowwwwwlllly notice that my granddaughter, Yelena is in the back of the car. And then I notice that my daughter Alexis is right next to her. “Hey, aren’t you the one who lives in Amsterdam?” Boy these hallucinations are terrible. Then I notice that John the Armenian and daughter Stef are in the car too. This is too freaky. Then one of the kids says, “there’s Tim de Buffalo (husband of Pulisha). “The whole freakin’ clan is here!”

I am speechless. They’ve been planning this thing for almost a year! I’m tellin’ you can’t trust anybody.