Sunday, April 8, 2018

Someone In Corporate Marketing Has A Sense Of Humor

After an entire lifetime of using bar soap, this year I decided to move to the gel/lotion type cleaners mostly after experiencing them in the various places we've traveled to. Think it kind of goes along with the whole addition of having a hair stylist, massages, pedicure type of thing.

Going to the isle in the store where they have all this stuff is an education unto itself. The kinds of terms and descriptions used to market these are...well a bit weird.  I mean 'ash'? What is so clean evoking about that? And there was one which claimed it had pheromones. Maybe if I was 40 years younger.

But the last time I shopped there was a sale on these washes from Old Spice. They had very weird packaging and names. But they were really discounted so I thought I'd give them a try. Then I read their marketing messages and I KNEW I had to try them.

First there's one called FIJI. And I quote:

With FIJI, your body is about to marooned on a pristine tropical island filled with the scent of palm trees, endangered species, exotic females, one dune buggy and a lifetime supply of fireworks.

Not happy with that imagery? How about KRAKENGARD. Helluva name for a body wash don't you think. It's message:

Nothing combats body smells and skin dirt like turtle doves, but those didn't test well in focus groups, so we went with a giant sea monster instead. Scrub your man suit clean with the power of KRAKENGARD! Preferred 2 to 1 over turtle doves.

Damn! I may be a body wash user but I sure the hell want a sea monster over a turtle dove!

What? Still not happy? Then try BEARGLOVE.

Still quoting:

BEARGLOVE is the fresh , confident scent that demands respect and then eats it!
Can you imagine a powerful, fearsome grizzly bear who can repair military helicopters and also speak confidently about world affairs? Yes? Then this is the body wash for you?

Man, so hard to chose - Sea Monster or Super Hero Bear.

All I can say is I am glad as all get out that at least SOMEONE in corporate marketing has a sense of humor.


Renee Michelle Goertzen said...

I would definitely like to know how to repair helecoptors. I will start using a body forthwith!

Renee Michelle Goertzen said...

A body wash that is. I'm using a body currently, and that's going great. No complaints.

alexis said...

RM - HAHA! Dad, thank you for sharing, that is hilarious.

Stef said...

Old spice has been making the tongue-in-cheek thing part of their branding for ages. Many of their ads are just as amusing. It seems like a JR it’s working!!!

Bernice said...

Wow, that was a great education for me. Who would have guessed there were such great choices out there.