Friday, January 23, 2015

Bitter-Sweet

The final whirlwind of family activity ended this morning as we were caught in the Pulandic Vortex that accompanies the physical moving of Pulandia from continent to continent.

#2 Pu and the Visigoths came in late Wednesday night, spent Thursday getting everything together for their move to Hong Kong.  Of course all the kids were wound up.  Everyone in their group was a combination of anxious and excited.  It took every cubic inch of auto storage space to get all the bags and all the people in and to the airport.

Even though they were here for just over a day, it was amazing how the home went from its pristine, Elder Fleet Command inspection ready status, to the Pulandia in exile look. Immediately upon getting home, Wife was throwing herself into  returning things here to here to Elder Fleet Command standards

I was very happy to have had this last bit of time with them even if it was stressful because they're going to be out of the country for two and half years.  The time with the grandkids was especially sweet.  And this brings up the whole topic of having family that is so far away.

Every visit is an event.   Whether we travel to them or they travel to us, it's not just a 'hey we were in the neighborhood so we stopped by' or 'are you free Saturday for dinner' moment.  It is a lot of valuable time and travel on all the parties to make the visit happen.  And you're very, very happy to be seeing each other but it is never in a normal setting or living pattern.  That brings a certain amount of stress.  Then all too soon it's over and either you or they are on the way again. 

So while we love the fact that our children have all pursued there dreams and have found great places pursue their lives, we miss having a more regular day-to-day relationship.  I will say that Skype has made things much better because you can see everyone. And I think as a family we make a real commitment to communicating consistently and regularly.  And to be perfectly honest, I don't think where we live would really be a great place for them to be pursuing their careers. 

Yet it is all a bit bittersweet.

Then again isn't that the nature of life in general?

3 comments:

terri said...

I was talking with a guy at work who has five kids, the oldest of whom is a college sophomore. He was telling me he just can't imagine his kids growing up and moving away from him. (He thinks my oldest being 4 hours away is much too far.)

I can appreciate his feelings, considering his stage in life. I still often feel the same way. But as I grow older, I realize that my kids being successful and happy in their lives is most important. As much as I want them near me, that comes secondary.

I was just reading that what we should really be striving for in our relationships (particularly family relationships,) is to love our spouses and children in such a way that they can survive independently of us. Loving another so much that they can't make it without you isn't true love. It's the setting them free, to survive happily on their own that is the measure of true love. Seems like you've accomplished that very well.

alexis said...

amen to all that! It is so nice you guys are at a time in your lives and have the means to be able to come and visit more often.

Bernice said...

I, too, feel the bittersweet pain. I am happy my children love where they are, but it is so far away.